Ever had a scenario where you needed to get someone’s attention and have already tried everything? And by “everything” that would include sacrificing virgins, summoning godzilla and nuking a small continent. Fret not, here at Slackerninja’s Freestyle Dojo, we have a method that’s fool proof and guarantees 100% results else your money back!
Ladies and gentlemen i present to you what is the greatest possible way to grab someone’s attention.
Ninja Monkeys. With spoons.
Did your head explode? Yeah i thought so, let me say that again. Ninja Monkeys. With spoons. Just don’t get any gibs on the carpet.
What you need for this are:
- 3 monkeys
- 3 spoons
- 1 DVD of the Ninja Scroll anime
- 1 TV
- 1 DVD player
- 1 empty room
- 1 airplane
Directions:
Hook up the TV and DVD player in the empty room, play the Ninja Scroll anime on loop. Leave the monkeys inside for a week. Carefully approach the room, hand them spoons. Get them to an airplane, zeroed into the coordinates of the person who’s attention you need. Air drop the monkeys right above said person for desired effect as illustrated below:
You might wonder, why spoons? Well because they're effective killing tools. Believe.
So there you have it all you attention whores seekers. The undisputedly most effective way to grab anyone’s attention!
If you’ve been fortunate to chance upon this blog and use this sagacious piece of advice do share your experiences by commenting below.
Disclaimer: Slackerninja’s Freestyle Dojo takes no responsibility for any possible loss of friendship, love, life, business opportunities or cookies that may occur while using this invaluable knowledge that you (read: everyone one on the internet) are exclusively privy to.
Tags: attention, awesome, how to get someone's attention, monkeys, ninjas, scared
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