Seems I’ve been spending too much time on Twitter. But don’t fret, it all leads up to moments that are valuable fodder for you and you alone. Oh maybe for the non-existent traversers of the internet who may chance upon this post of sheer awesome. And by awesome I mean a copy-paste a well edited and thought out compilation of what’s been going on in the Twatterverse Twitterverse.
‘I complimented her…in a parallel universe.’
‘All you guys are at your phones busy getting anti-social.’
‘I do not call it a pipe. I call it a straw.’
‘We can use profanity at work. That’s fucking awesome!’
“You didn’t “overhear it” someone told it to you!” #GG
“Do something for the kids!!!”
“It’s a Macbook Pro, it’s for PRO users.” #applefans
‘Would you like to taste my tasty nut?”
‘Better than you and your frilly underwear.’ #wtf
” The similarity between life & my left butt cheek…neither are right nor fair.”
“Don’t you know me by now? I’m not soft.”
“The Resident Evil video game did well right? That’s great for a movie based franchise.”
“If you’re a member, bring your member for a 50% discount on services offered”.
“Even if you’re vegetarian you cannot eat without a plate.”
“It has nothing to do with size…I’m telling you man to man”.
So as you can see, it’s all been done for your well-being and all-round epic win. Having said that I shall furnish you with more posts regularly lest you do to me what Elin does to Tiger Woods in Southpark.
Now Listening To: The Chemical Brothers – The Test