Mr. X: Recommend me a sitcom pls Dudeee

me: Suits

Mr. X: Dude saw it, anything else

Mr. X: N btw suits is not a sitcom :p its drama

Mr. X: Sitcom is only comedy

Mr. X: Like himym,friends,seinfeld

Mr. X: Think n tell

me: Community Big Bang Theory, South park

Mr. X: Seen

Mr. X: Then

Mr. X: Anything new?

me: 2 girls 1 cup

Mr. X: Or really old

Mr. X: Whats that abt?

me: watch it

Mr. X: 1 girls 2 cups is normal

Mr. X: Ok

me: lemonparty

Mr. X: Hmm

Mr. X: Checking these two thanks

Mr. X: Tell me more if u know

me: Goatse

Mr. X: K checkin

Mr. X: Cant find goatse on imdb

me: google or youtube

Mr. X: Wow all 3 not listed

Mr. X: So these just air on youtube

Mr. X: No download

me: look around, you’ll find ‘em

Mr. X: Wtf is that porn?

Mr. X: 0_o

me: lol no

Mr. X: Search says not safe

me: your machine is prolly a pr0n server

Mr. X: Its something to trick ur friends n record reactions

me: lulwut?! It’s not a reality show, it’s a sitcom

Mr. X: Download link pls

me: *redacted*

Mr. X: Is it nsfw?

me: no

Mr. X: Cool

Mr. X’s new status message – Im The Lyrical Gangster \m/

Now Listening to: Metallica- Ronnie

Friend: So yeah, Abhay’s coming over.

Rishi: Nice. Jam session?

Friend: Yes, you know, after she’s started calling me Superman, i’ve wanted to so record a jam session with that Superman* song. The one that goes “If I go crazy now will you call me Superman….

Rishi: …if I’m alive and well won’t you be there holding my hand? I’ll keep you by my side with my superhuman might, my kryptonite. Yeahhhh!”,oh that song? You’re sure she’s your co-worker right?

Friend: Yes.

Rishi: Cool. While you’re at it, you can ask her if she likes your undies on the inside or not.

Friend: Bastard.

Five minutes into the conversation

Friend: You know when she started to call me Superman, i wanted to ask her just one thing.

Rishi: What?

Friend: I wanted to ask her, “If I’m Superman, would you like me to use x-ray vision on you?”

Rishi: Bastard.

*For those of you who have been in cryogenic stasis and just woke up, this is the song in question. Epicness at its best. Oh and the video is pretty bad ass too:

Friend: Don’t remind me of Superhero. My co-worker, she calls me Superman.

Rishi: Um…so, she wants to see you wear your underwear on the outside?

Friend: The following dialogue was too vulgar to represent on this blog.

Now Listening To: The Killers – This is the World That We Live In

Even stranger however was that our job appraisals were scheduled for the same day i got back to work post-26/11. Fun times really, especially when you’re given the appraisal sheet a good 20 minutes before the process even begins. All a part of my boss’ idea to give him “feedback”, which is pretty hilarious considering that i’m probably the last person who can give an honest estimate of himself (this blog bears testament to that). Akin to asking Chuck Norris if he could strangle you with a wireless telephone. Leading to a bit of conversation that went something like:

Boss: Do you think you’re fit for your job?
h3lios: Isn’t that why you’re here?

Anyway, apparently i’m a “team player” and i take “initiative”. i’ll leave you with that as i’m busy laughing about it till next week.

Now Listening To: Air – Lucky and Unhappy

Now Listening To: Rage Against The Machine – Killing In Thy Name